Bits and Pieces
Today we arrived in Xi'an, a mid-size city in the middle of the Shaanxi provice. And, of course, by mid-sized, they mean that it is home to 7.4 million people. A hamlet, really.
I am going a wee bit bananas. Another huge city, with a smoggy sky and a bizzare prediliction for billboards. Perhaps Xi'an means Billboard. Alas, no. It means "Peaceful Kingdom in the West." It used to be named Chang'an, which roughly translates into "Best Peaceful City" and then the capital got moved to Beijing. Sucks to be you, former Best Peaceful City.
My last day or so in Beijing was amazing, slightly depressing, and beautiful - quite sunny. The city took on a completely different quality when the smog lifted. But more about that and the Great Wall (AWESOME) later. Today is dedicated to random descriptions. In part because I can't always read what I've written and am having trouble composing a coherent narrative. And, in that I mirror China's 34 provinces and seventeen dynastys. Hooray for that. Okay - thoughts.
WILD SWANS
The book Wild Swans, by Jung Chang, which I read before I came is turning out to be a great asset in knowing some of the Chinese modern history that's so important - Mao, the Cultural Revolution. It's great. I feel like people might avoid it because it has the subtitle "Three Generations of Women in China" which sounds to Americans like a Steel-Magnolias type of work. This is incorrect. Only scoff at this if you too have been sent to forced labor in the mountains bordering Tubet and your mother was a concubine that fled a warlord husband whose first wife was trying to kill you. If you have done that, you may dismiss this as a chick-flick novel. Otherwise, it's fantastic.
TOILETS
One might think that toilets are toilets all over the world. This is incorrect. Chinese toilets are like the entire toilet has sunk into the ground, leaving the seat exposed. You squat on the seat, which is level with the ground, and pee into the bowl. Even in fancy places, most of the toilets are like this. How can one tell it is a fancy place? They give you toilet paper.
These toilets are not that hard to use, especially if you are okay with perhaps maybe peeing on your foot. I am okay with this, for I knew, long before I came to China that I was the type of person that was given the chance to pee on my foot, I probably would. I learned this in 5th grade at the last day of school picnic when I was trying to go to the bathroom in the bushes and peed all over my shorts. To avoid this being noticed, I dove into the lagoon by the Peggy Notebart Nature Museum. So, I can dig the risk.
OPT
Old People Time. This is what I am on. I go to bed at ten, very tired from all the exciting things. I wake up at four in the morning. Last night I fell asleep at the dinner table while an NPR reporter was speaking to us in a charming English accent. Normally a charming English accent will keep me awake for hours. Not so! I am old.
Although tonight is unscheduled and maybe I'll go nuts an be up until 10:15pm.
MAKE YOUR CHILDREN LEARN CHINESE (MANDARIN)
I am serious. All the things I have learned about China have lead me to believe we should all learn Chinese. Most of the Westerners living here have a very specific perspective on what's going on in China and it all adds up to the fact that this is a Communist country only in name and power - the economy is capitalist and the members of the Communist party are getting ridiculously wealthy. The one party system also means that the path of this country in the next two decades is fairly unpredictable - repressive rule could return to mediate the distribution of wealth and power. Or, there could be a popular uprising against what many Chinese people percieve as unecessary inequalities. Right now, China really wants to be our friend - we have a lot in common, both interested or possessing Superpower status.
But the way for the average non-Chinese person to circumvent this political situation (and I guess by this I mean the feeling that we could get locked into a very specific foreign policy in regards to China - now we're rather flexible, but it would be unfortunate if this moved towards the Cold War sorts of stances - detente and so forth) is to know Chinese. I wish I knew Chinese. I could say more than hello, thank you, and no. I could read the billboards. I could communicate with 1/5th of the earth's population. Or at least the 13.8 million of them in Beijing or the 7.4 of them in Xi'an.
BOTTLED WATER FREAK OUTS
Soon, one member of this trip will crack and start waving a bottle of water screaming "IS IT BOTTLED!??IS IT BOTTLED!!!". We're all obsessed with drinkable water. Soon, we might eat each other.
JON DINERSTEIN'S AUNT AND UNCLE ARE ON THIS TRIP
Jon Dinerstein was the piano player for IGP, subject to introduction often by saying, "Hey, have you met Jon? He plays piano?"
Jon was always mad we called him Jon Dinerstein and never just Jon in the abscense of other Jons. This happened to Mike Cohen the piano player too.
FOOD
The food is incredible and ranges from the interesting and delicious to the gross. I am trying not to be picky. Last night I tried duck heart. A bit dry around the ventricle.
Tips for future travel: do not sit with picky eaters. They will drive you ballistic.
You also might think I am eating lots of rice. Nay! Here in North China the main grain is wheat due to the lack of arable land for rice-paddies. Did I read that in a book? Yes!
MR. FRUSTRATINGLY GOOD QUESTION
There's a guy here, a total ham. Many jokes about marriage in the Take My Wife, Please vein. We asked Wendy, one of our guides when she met her husband and she said something and then he said, "But after marriage it's never the same! Crack the whip!"
But whenever we have a speaker he asks the BEST questions. Such good questions. Frustratingly good. ARG! Mr. Frustratingly Good Question!
THE BY FAR MOST PUZZLING EXCHANGE I'VE HAD
1: So, what do you do?
ME: I'm an actor.
1: Maybe you could put on a geisha play.
AREN'T GEISHAS FROM JAPAN?
YES.
WHO SAID THAT? WAS IT MR. FRUSTRATINGLY GOOD QUESTION?
YES.
So, that's the miscellaneous file. I want to see if I can read this here - it was blocked in Beijing. A shame. A tragedy for the free press.
The Great Wall, though - that was a genuinely amazing experience. So beautiful. I wish I could have sat up there all day without being at the whimsy of a tour. More on the last few days in Beijing a little bit later.
Mags, if you're reading this, write Mom an e-mail through me. We want to know if you've made out with Michael Phelps.
I am going a wee bit bananas. Another huge city, with a smoggy sky and a bizzare prediliction for billboards. Perhaps Xi'an means Billboard. Alas, no. It means "Peaceful Kingdom in the West." It used to be named Chang'an, which roughly translates into "Best Peaceful City" and then the capital got moved to Beijing. Sucks to be you, former Best Peaceful City.
My last day or so in Beijing was amazing, slightly depressing, and beautiful - quite sunny. The city took on a completely different quality when the smog lifted. But more about that and the Great Wall (AWESOME) later. Today is dedicated to random descriptions. In part because I can't always read what I've written and am having trouble composing a coherent narrative. And, in that I mirror China's 34 provinces and seventeen dynastys. Hooray for that. Okay - thoughts.
WILD SWANS
The book Wild Swans, by Jung Chang, which I read before I came is turning out to be a great asset in knowing some of the Chinese modern history that's so important - Mao, the Cultural Revolution. It's great. I feel like people might avoid it because it has the subtitle "Three Generations of Women in China" which sounds to Americans like a Steel-Magnolias type of work. This is incorrect. Only scoff at this if you too have been sent to forced labor in the mountains bordering Tubet and your mother was a concubine that fled a warlord husband whose first wife was trying to kill you. If you have done that, you may dismiss this as a chick-flick novel. Otherwise, it's fantastic.
TOILETS
One might think that toilets are toilets all over the world. This is incorrect. Chinese toilets are like the entire toilet has sunk into the ground, leaving the seat exposed. You squat on the seat, which is level with the ground, and pee into the bowl. Even in fancy places, most of the toilets are like this. How can one tell it is a fancy place? They give you toilet paper.
These toilets are not that hard to use, especially if you are okay with perhaps maybe peeing on your foot. I am okay with this, for I knew, long before I came to China that I was the type of person that was given the chance to pee on my foot, I probably would. I learned this in 5th grade at the last day of school picnic when I was trying to go to the bathroom in the bushes and peed all over my shorts. To avoid this being noticed, I dove into the lagoon by the Peggy Notebart Nature Museum. So, I can dig the risk.
OPT
Old People Time. This is what I am on. I go to bed at ten, very tired from all the exciting things. I wake up at four in the morning. Last night I fell asleep at the dinner table while an NPR reporter was speaking to us in a charming English accent. Normally a charming English accent will keep me awake for hours. Not so! I am old.
Although tonight is unscheduled and maybe I'll go nuts an be up until 10:15pm.
MAKE YOUR CHILDREN LEARN CHINESE (MANDARIN)
I am serious. All the things I have learned about China have lead me to believe we should all learn Chinese. Most of the Westerners living here have a very specific perspective on what's going on in China and it all adds up to the fact that this is a Communist country only in name and power - the economy is capitalist and the members of the Communist party are getting ridiculously wealthy. The one party system also means that the path of this country in the next two decades is fairly unpredictable - repressive rule could return to mediate the distribution of wealth and power. Or, there could be a popular uprising against what many Chinese people percieve as unecessary inequalities. Right now, China really wants to be our friend - we have a lot in common, both interested or possessing Superpower status.
But the way for the average non-Chinese person to circumvent this political situation (and I guess by this I mean the feeling that we could get locked into a very specific foreign policy in regards to China - now we're rather flexible, but it would be unfortunate if this moved towards the Cold War sorts of stances - detente and so forth) is to know Chinese. I wish I knew Chinese. I could say more than hello, thank you, and no. I could read the billboards. I could communicate with 1/5th of the earth's population. Or at least the 13.8 million of them in Beijing or the 7.4 of them in Xi'an.
BOTTLED WATER FREAK OUTS
Soon, one member of this trip will crack and start waving a bottle of water screaming "IS IT BOTTLED!??IS IT BOTTLED!!!". We're all obsessed with drinkable water. Soon, we might eat each other.
JON DINERSTEIN'S AUNT AND UNCLE ARE ON THIS TRIP
Jon Dinerstein was the piano player for IGP, subject to introduction often by saying, "Hey, have you met Jon? He plays piano?"
Jon was always mad we called him Jon Dinerstein and never just Jon in the abscense of other Jons. This happened to Mike Cohen the piano player too.
FOOD
The food is incredible and ranges from the interesting and delicious to the gross. I am trying not to be picky. Last night I tried duck heart. A bit dry around the ventricle.
Tips for future travel: do not sit with picky eaters. They will drive you ballistic.
You also might think I am eating lots of rice. Nay! Here in North China the main grain is wheat due to the lack of arable land for rice-paddies. Did I read that in a book? Yes!
MR. FRUSTRATINGLY GOOD QUESTION
There's a guy here, a total ham. Many jokes about marriage in the Take My Wife, Please vein. We asked Wendy, one of our guides when she met her husband and she said something and then he said, "But after marriage it's never the same! Crack the whip!"
But whenever we have a speaker he asks the BEST questions. Such good questions. Frustratingly good. ARG! Mr. Frustratingly Good Question!
THE BY FAR MOST PUZZLING EXCHANGE I'VE HAD
1: So, what do you do?
ME: I'm an actor.
1: Maybe you could put on a geisha play.
AREN'T GEISHAS FROM JAPAN?
YES.
WHO SAID THAT? WAS IT MR. FRUSTRATINGLY GOOD QUESTION?
YES.
So, that's the miscellaneous file. I want to see if I can read this here - it was blocked in Beijing. A shame. A tragedy for the free press.
The Great Wall, though - that was a genuinely amazing experience. So beautiful. I wish I could have sat up there all day without being at the whimsy of a tour. More on the last few days in Beijing a little bit later.
Mags, if you're reading this, write Mom an e-mail through me. We want to know if you've made out with Michael Phelps.
posted by The Gadabout at 6:38 PM
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